“Genuinely – I don’t – I just don’t have the time for it even though I think it will be great” – what lots of people say to explain why they haven’t taken action on something they really want to do, or why they said no to the opportunity they wanted to leap at, or why they don’t say yes to coaching.
I spoke in a recent podcast about how some clients I have worked with found that getting on top of how they spend their time was life changing for them. Lack of time is real. Time is one of life’s precious commodities, and meeting work, children and family needs alone can take up most of the available hours we have.
Who and what we give our time to says so much to the world about what we value, but it’s so easy to get sucked into spending time on the stuff that needs doing but doesn’t serve us.
So how do you carve out hours to spend on the activities that are life enhancing, make you feel great, and can take your life in the direction you want it to go in?
Firstly, let’s look at the reasons why we say no:
- We allow our priorities to lie somewhere other than where we think they do
- Change is hard – we have to create new habits to bring in new activities or new behaviours which are hard to maintain when life gets busy and stressful
- Other people are dictating how we spend our time
- Your diary is full each day – there’s just no space
- You aren’t sure this new thing you have to make time for is going to be worth it
What can we do to take more control of our time so that it serves us?
- List 6-10 key areas of your life (work, study, children, other family, exercise / health, friends, TV watching, reading / podcasts etc) and rate it 1-10 on how much of your time it takes up. Be really honest when it comes to the TV / radio / reading / podcasts bit or the dog walking with a friend after school drop off, or how much time you spend doing stuff for other family members. What seems like a quick job may well take you an hour or more each time.
- Now – how would you spend your time in an ideal world? Factor in all the necessary like children, work, but think about how you would delegate / organise / deliver if you could have anything. On client realised she needed to have some time away from her 18-month-old but couldn’t afford nursery whilst she was studying. So she did a care share with a friend, carved out some time alone and then paid for nursery when she completed her study and got a pay rise.
- What’s the difference? Would you rather spend an hour walking / exercising / coaching that watching TV? Where would you like to make some swaps?
- Doing by Habit stack – let’s say it’s hard to find the time for an hour of exercise. Stacking one new habit on top of an existing habit can help make the new habit stick. How about finding a gym or exercise class straight after work or school drop off and being done before you get home?